I love the contemporary poetry of David Whyte. The True Love is a particular favourite of mine because it’s about the courage it takes to embrace that which you are called to do or be in this world – the true love. We don’t find it or experience it until we step out of the safety of our boat into the risky waters and the essence of life itself. Enjoy!

The True Love by David Whyte

There’s a faith in loving fiercely the one who is rightfully yours
especially if you have waited years and especially if part of you never
believed you could deserve this loved and beckoning hand held
out to you this way.
I am thinking of faith now and the testaments of loneliness
and what we feel we are worthy of in this world.
Years ago in the Hebrides I remember an old man
who would walk every morning on the gray stones
to the shore of baying seals, who would press his
hat to his chest in the blustering salt wind and say his
prayer to the turbulent Jesus hidden in the waters.
And I think of the story of the storm and the people
waking and seeing the distant, yet familiar figure,
far across the water calling to them.
And how we are all preparing for that abrupt waking
and that calling and that moment when we have to say yes!
Except it will not come so grandly, so biblically,
but more subtly, and intimately in the face
of the one you know you have to love.
So that when we finally step out of the boat
toward them we find, everything holds us,
and everything confirms our courage.
And if you wanted to drown, you could,
But you don’t, because finally, after all
this struggle and all these years,
you don’t want to anymore.
You’ve simply had enough of drowning
and you want to live, and you want to love.
And you’ll walk across any territory,
and any darkness, however fluid,
and however dangerous to take the one
hand and the one life, you know belongs in yours.

When I reflect on effective leadership, the quality I often think of is integrity. Most of us would agree that in order to be successful as a leader, one must have a high degree of integrity. And I want to press the “pause” button for a moment to reflect on the meaning of the word integrity. Webster’s dictionary defines it as “the quality or state of being complete or undivided”. What is it to be complete or undivided and how is this embodied in a leader?

The author Parker Palmer often refers to the notion of the Divided Life; how from an early age we are shaped by messages from our families and from society that it is not safe to be out in the world as our true selves. As we grow into adulthood, we grow into a life where our inner selves are disconnected from our outer selves. My experience of a leader with a high degree of integrity is one where their inner and outer selves have merged into one. These leaders are undivided, sharing their inner truth outwardly, and are known for who they truly are at their core.

When we think of positive role models of leadership, we may think of Martin Luther King, Nelson Mandela, Rosa Parks – people who have had the courage to be known and to stand in the face of criticism. They have engaged conflict for the sake of what they believed in.

So let’s talk about you and your role as a leader in your life. In your career, in your relationships with others and in relationship with yourself, where is your opportunity to be courageous? Do you hide your truth from those who disagree with you in order to avoid conflict? And perhaps more importantly, how does that feel when you catch yourself doing it? When I catch myself, I notice a feeling of discord; of being divided and unheard, of un-wholeness, of being out of integrity.

And so here’s a call to that leader that lies within you that is waiting to be heard. There’s a place for you to be known and it’s time to be courageous.  Contact me to release the leader in you.